Yours Toothfully by Dr Chan Joon Yee

2008 has come and gone.
Lots to remember and lots to mourn.
Let’s welcome 2009 with open arms
May hope linger on our empty palms.

So what’s new? Standing proudly at 165m or 42 storeys high, the largest observation wheel in the world - The Singapore Flyer, left 173 passengers stranded from 5.00 pm to 11.11pm due to a major power disruption. As I read the official reports online (I don’t read newsPAPers), I discovered 3 interesting and puzzling pieces of information.

1. Since the Flyer became operational in February this year, this is the third time it has encountered problems.

2. The last time a technical glitch occurred was just three weeks ago, on December 4. The wheel was stuck for nearly five hours due to extreme weather conditions and some 70 people were affected. In July, the Flyer stopped due to a minor fault in the braking system.

3. At least five passengers were lifted through the hatch on top of each capsule and winched to the ground by a private rescue firm engaged by Singapore Flyer.

Firstly, I didn’t hear about the Flyer breaking down before this. Maybe it’s because I didn’t read the newsPAPers or maybe the newsPAPers didn’t report. But certainly, if “extreme weather conditions” like a snowstorm or a hurricane had hit Singapore, there was no way I could have gone to work on that day. How come I didn’t know anything about “extreme weather conditions” either? And out of 173, “at least” 5 were rescued. Does that make sense? No. Even a primary school kid will say “Out of 173, only 5 were rescued in 6 hours.”

As Popeye would say, it’s “embarrassking”. Pity the folks who were trapped for nearly 6 hours without food, water and bathroom. I wonder if they have a “no urinating” signs in the capsules. I don’t blame the suffering passengers from feeling pissed off (pun intended)

I wonder if they would be fined if they had urinated on the floor. The evidence is all in the “embarrassking” surveillance footage. Well, apart from a few burst bladders, No one was physically hurt in the incident. Some may have missed their connecting flights. Some may have missed the opportunity to solemnise their marriage and then spend their honeymoon in the capsule … the important thing is, nobody was hurt and everyone was reimbursed. Was the management obliged to do it? What if the passengers demanded for higher compensation? Would they fine the “pissers” raise funds for that?

But I’m sure there is some fine print behind every Flyer ticket that protects the company from passengers who try to claim opportunity costs and other intangible losses resulting from such troublesome disruptions. Like the fine print in minibond purchases, the fine print behind that Flyer ticket is probably read by few and understood by none. My fellow writer in the Chinese department, Dadi claims that he has no problem understanding fine print in any language. Dadi assures us that any sort of fine print can be translated into layman’s Cantonese - lei sei lei ge si.

When in school, we used to play a trick on an unpopular classmate of ours who was always tagging along wherever we went. Whenever that unpopular guy saw a group of us leaving the classroom together, he would follow us. We had no choice but to go the beach, go swimming at the pool or go to the movies with him tagging along. We didn’t want to hurt his feelings by telling him that we didn’t welcome him, but being the mischievous boys we once were, we decided to break it to him loud and clear.

One fine day, the whole group of us pretended that we were going somewhere. When we saw him coming, we would whisper the magic word to one another and when he approached and asked us where we were going, we would all shout: “I’m going home” and dispersed in a most dramatic fashion. Interestingly, we had to do it twice before he got our message. Luckily, he didn’t kill himself.

It should be noted, however, that not everyone can take this sort of insult. Individuals suffering from borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be extremely sensitive to perceptions of abandonment. Here’s something from the experts.

“The perception of impending separation or rejection, or the loss of external structure, can lead to profound changes in self-image, affect, cognition, and behaviour. These individuals are very sensitive to environmental circumstances. They experience intense abandonment fears and inappropriate anger even when faced with a realistic time-limited separation or when there are unavoidable changes in plans (e.g. panic or fury when someone important to them is just a few minutes late or must cancel an appointment). They may believe that this “abandonment” implies they are “bad.” These abandonment fears are related to an intolerance of being alone and a need to have other people with them. Their frantic efforts to avoid abandonment may include impulsive actions such as self-mutilating or suicidal behaviors…”

BPD may not be as horrifying as what we saw in Fatal Attraction even though unbridled rage is a common feature of this disorder. Abandonment is not such an issue when people with BPD are left with dining and shopping companions. They just cannot tolerate being alone. Thus, when a BPD is busy having a good time with friends, he/she will not be too keen to get calls from loved ones. However, when the BPD is home alone and gets no calls from his/her loved ones, the BPD will get angry and accuse his/her loved ones of abandoning him/her. Ironically, the more the BPD gets angry, insulting and abusive, the more he/she discourages the other party to make or take the calls. The BPD somehow doesn’t seem to realise that being nasty and abusive will further jeopardise his/her status. When they are nasty and abusive, they blame the whole world for abandoning them. It somehow just doesn’t get to them that they are to be blamed.Most incomprehensible, is the BPD who gets enraged with abandonment when he/she is the one who went away.

So what’s new? Thailand’s Democrat party’s Abhisit Vejjajiva became Thailand’s Prime Minister (the girls are cheering). Things seem to have settled down quite a bit. Elections are in the pipeline and the question on every cynic’s mind is, “What next?”. Unlike many foreigners who seem to like Abhisit’s fluent English and global outlook, it’s what his party stands for that will decide the kind of action or inaction from the Thai government in the following months. In a coalition of enemies who only decided to bury the hatchet seconds ago, I would be too busy watching my back to notice an elephant charging from the front.

I’m not imagining things. If we look into the history of this party, it should be quite obvious that the so-called Democrats have always been a wayang opposition party to provide some illusion of democracy whenever there’s a military dictatorship in power. How is it expected to behave as a ruling party? The amicable but ineffectual Chuan Leekpai will offer us some answers. Back to the good old Thailand where everything is cheap for tourists and where Thai peasants/servants humbly receive orders/insults from their Farang “masters” while the school books tell of how proud Thais are, never to be colonised. I never make bones about the fact that I wish Thailand could be a little like Singapore and Singapore a little like Thailand. Both countries have strayed from the Buddha’s Middle Path.

My elder son is celebrating his 6th birthday. I’ll be trying to run away from my 45th in a couple of months’ time. How do I do that? By going to Nepal and climbing a 6129m peak in winter at “Sherpa speed”. I’m not trying to show off. It’s just that I simply can’t afford the “normal” 18-day expedition recommended for most recreational climbers. By telling myself that not many 45-year-olds can do this, I may be able to cheat myself that I’m not quite 45.

Is it too early for new year resolutions? Never mind. I don’t work for the government. But helpless in the current situation, I seem to have more wishes and prayers than resolutions. I wish for better business. I wish for fewer … make that zero alamak patients. I wish for less GST, fewer ERPs … Just wishes. Perhaps the only real resolution I have, is to be kinder to myself. Yes, 3 years have passed since I started my clinic at Lucky Plaza and I just realised that I haven’t been kind enough to myself. I definitely plan to allocate more time for leisure. This coming Chinese New Year trip to Nepal is a reward I give myself for slogging so hard throughout. Come 2009, I’m going to slog even harder, but I’ll also play a lot harder too. Looks like I’ll be planning a few short trips to Indonesia and China inb 2009. I’ll not just buy Transformers and Thomas for my kids, I’m going to start buying things for myself too. How’s that for a resolution?

The festive season is here and I’m certainly going to celebrate. There is an article in Today on binge drinking (I never buy newsPAPers). They’ve got an interesting definition for binge drinking: “consuming five drinks or more for males, or four drinks or more for females, within two hours.” I’m sure I can stay out of that range. Cheers!